1 1449 Lorenzo de' Medici; 1735 Paul Revere; 1752 Betsy Ross; 1879 E. M. Forster; 1895 J. Edgar Hoover; 1900 Xavier Cugat; 1909 Barry Goldwater; 1919 J.D. Salinger; 1940 Frank Langella; 1943 Don Novello.
• 1673: Regular mail delivery begins between New York & Boston; mostly postcards containing insults about sports teams.
• 1797: Albany replaces New York City as capital of New York State; we're still not sure how the hell this happened.
• 1946: Emperor Hirohito of Japan announces that he is not a god; the Japanese public sighs, "Oh, NOW he tells us."
• 1998: Mongolia switches from a 46 hour to 40 hour work week; this new number simply acknowledges how much time workers are now wasting on the internet.
2 1920 Isaac Asimov.
• 1946: Unable to resume rule after World War II, King Zog of Albania abdicates but retains his claim to the throne and his claim to the coolest sounding king name ever.
• 1974: 55 MPH speed limit imposed by Richard Nixon; it's all part of his escape plan, wherein no one else can legally drive fast enough to catch him on his way out of the country.
3 1926 George Martin; 1945 Victoria Principal, Stephen Stills; 1956 Mel Gibson; 1960 Joan Chen; 1967 Helena Bonham Carter.
• 1521: Martin Luther excommunicated by Roman Catholic Church.
• 1872: First patent list issued by U.S. Patent Office; it is immediately patented.
• 1952: Dragnet with Jack Webb premieres on TV.
• 1962: Pope John XXIII excommunicates Fidel Castro.
• 1977: Apple Computer iNcorporates.
4 1914 Jane Wyman; 1937 Dyan Cannon; 1941 Maureen Reagan; 1947 Dan Quayle.
• 1725: Young Benjamin Franklin arrives in London and immediately commences wenching.
• 1935: Bob Hope's first appearance on network radio; he is on the air almost continually until 1999.
• 1980: President Carter announces U.S. boycott of Moscow Olympics.
5 1931 Robert Duvall; 1942 Charlie Rose; 1946 Diane Keaton; 1950 Michael O'Donoghue; 1953 George Tenet.
• 1836: Davy Crockett arrives in Texas, just in time for the siege of the Alamo.
• 1959: Bozo the Clown show premieres.
• 1976: MacNeil-Lehrer Report premieres.
• 1998: Vandals decapitate Copenhagen's Little Mermaid statue.
6 1878 Carl Sandburg; 1880 Tom Mix; 1913 Loretta Young; 1914 Danny Thomas; 1915 Alan Watts; 1924 Earl Scruggs; 1925 John DeLorean.
• 1838 Samuel Morse sends first telegraph message, "What hath God wrought?"
• 1898 First telephone message from a submerged submarine, "You'll never guess where I'm calling from!"
• 1914 Merrill Lynch founded; founders in 2008.
7 1800 Millard Fillmore; 1911 Butterfly McQueen; 1912 Charles Addams; 1938 Paul Revere (the "& the Raiders" one); 1946 Jann Wenner.
• 1622: Germany & Transylvania sign Peace of Nikolsburg, stipulating that all vampires in Germany must return to Transylvania.
• 1894: Motion picture experiment films comedian Fred Ott sneezing; Ott's movie career stalls after his sinuses are drained.
• 1949: First photo of genes; it takes several tries, as the genes weren't smiling and kept closing their eyes.
• 1967: The Newlywed Game premieres.
8 1904 Peter Arno; 1912 José Ferrer; 1923 Larry Storch; 1926 Soupy Sales; 1931 Bill Graham; 1935 Elvis Presley; 1938 Bob Eubanks; 1942 Stephen Hawking; 1947 David Bowie; 1969 R Kelly.
• 1790: George Washington delivers first "State of the Union" address; "Too soon to say," is his estimation.
• 1951: Believed extinct since 1615, a Cahow is rediscovered in Bermuda where it has just been on vacation the whole time.
• 1966: Beatles' Rubber Soul album goes #1 & stays #1 for 6 weeks.
• 1966: Who & the Kinks perform on the last Shindig TV show on ABC
9 1908 Simone de Beauvoir; 1913 Richard Nixon; 1914 Gypsy Rose Lee; 1925 Lee Van Cleef; 1935 Bob Denver; 1941 Joan Baez.
• 1956: Dear Abby debuts.
• 1972: Howard Hughes says Clifford Irving's biography of him is a fake.
• 1998: Decapitated head of Danish Little Mermaid statue is returned.
10 1898 Sergei Eisenstein; 1904 Ray Bolger; 1908 Paul Henreid; 1939 Sal Mineo; 1945 Rod Stewart; 1948 Donald Fagen; 1949 George Foreman; 1953 Pat Benatar.
• 1776 Common Sense by Thomas Paine, published.
11 1942 Clarence Clemons; 1971 Mary J Blige.
• 1949: First snowfall recorded in Los Angeles; no word on that day's weather in hell.
• 1963: The Whiskey-a-go-go opens in Los Angeles.
• 1964: Beatles I Want to Hold Your Hand is #80 in US.
• 1964: Surgeon General reports that cigarette smoking may be hazardous.
12 1856 John Singer Sargent; 1876 Jack London; 1906 Tex Ritter, Henny Youngman; 1941 Long John Baldry; 1949 Wayne Wang; 1951 Kirstie Alley, Rush Limbaugh; 1954 Howard Stern.
• 1863: President Jefferson Davis delivers his "State of the Confederacy" address; "temporary" is the state of the confederacy.
• 1906: Dow Jones closes above 100 (100.26) for the first time; we look forward to it getting up that far again someday soon.
• 1966: LBJ vows to stay in Vietnam until communist aggression ends; American public's response, "Okay, call us when you get back" isn't quite what he was hoping for.
13 1628 Charles Perrault; 1834 Horatio Alger Jr.; 1884 Sophie Tucker; 1913 Ralph Edwards; 1919 Army Archerd, Robert Stack; 1925 Gwen Verdon; 1931 Charles Nelson Reilly; 1934 Rip Taylor; 1948 T. Bone Burnett; 1949 Brandon Tartikoff; 1955 Jay McInerney; 1961 Julia Louis-Dreyfus.
• 1920: A New York Times editorial reports rockets can never fly; it also insists the paper will never print color photos.
• 1957: Wham-O produces the first Frisbee but their dog runs off with the prototype and it's three days before they get it away from him and can make a second one.
14 1741 Benedict Arnold; 1886 Hugh Lofting; 1892 Hal Roach; 1906 William Bendix; 1919 Andy Rooney; 1925 Yukio Mishima; 1941 Faye Dunaway; 1952 Sydney Biddle Barrows.
• 1954: Marilyn Monroe marries Joe DiMaggio.
• 1990: The Simpsons premieres.
15 1908 Edward Teller; 1913 Lloyd Bridges; 1941 Captain Beefheart; 1947 Andrea Martin; 1951 Charo.
• 1797: First top hat is worn.
• 1861: Steam elevator patented by Elisha Otis.
• 1870: Donkey first used as symbol of Democratic Party.
• 1973: Gene Shalit joins the Today Show; his moustache, however, holds out for more money, and doesn't appear until late March.
16 1933 Susan Sontag.
• 1939: Comic strip Superman debuts.
• 1974: Jaws by Peter Benchley is published; America spends rest of the year on the edge of its seat in terror.
• 1976: Donny & Marie musical/variety show premieres; America spends rest of the year on the edge of its seat in terror.
• 1985: Playboy announces the end of stapling centerfolds
17 1922 Betty White; 1925 Rock Hudson; 1927 Eartha Kitt; 1931 James Earl Jones; 1934 Shari Lewis; 1949 Andy Kaufman; 1956 David Caruso; 1962 Jim Carrey; 1971 Kid Rock.
• 1926: George Burns marries Gracie Allen.
• 1987: President Reagan signs secret order permitting covert sale of arms to Iran.
18 1892 Oliver Hardy; 1904 Cary Grant; 1955 Kevin Costner.
• 1644: Bostonians report North America's first UFO sighting; the official explanation, "They're Witches" is widely disputed.
• 1948: Ted Mack's Original Amateur Hour begins; it's a lot like American Idol but without the sadism or Simon Cowell.
• 1974: The $6 Million Man premieres.
19 1807 Robert E. Lee; 1809 Edgar Allan Poe; 1839 Paul Cézanne; 1921 Patricia Highsmith; 1923 Jean Stapleton; 1935 Tippi Hedren; 1938 Phil Everly; 1942 Shelly Fabares; 1943 Janis Joplin; 1954 Katey Sagal.
• 1903: New long-distance bicycle race, "Tour de France," announced.
• 1937: Howard Hughes sets transcontinental air record of 7 hours, 28 minutes and 25 seconds; his luggage does not arrive until 1943.
20 1889 "Leadbelly"; 1896 George Burns; 1920 Federico Fellini, DeForest Kelley; 1926 Patricia Neal; 1929 Arte Johnson; 1956 Bill Maher; 1970 Skeet Ulrich.
• 1930 First radio broadcast of The Lone Ranger.
• 1949: J. Edgar Hoover gives Shirley Temple a tear gas fountain pen; she later uses it on Mr.-Grabby-Hands Darryl Zanuck at a post-Oscar party.
• 1964: Meet The Beatles album released in U.S.
21 1924 Benny Hill; 1926 Steve Reeves; 1939 Wolfman Jack; 1940 Jack Nicklaus; 1941 Placido Domingo.
• 1962: Snow falls in San Francisco; Jerry Garcia panics thinking his stash of coke has blown outside.
• 1994: Lorena Bobbitt is found temporarily insane for chopping off her cheating husband's penis.
22 1875 D.W. Griffith; 1907 Marie Dressler; 1909 Ann Sothern; 1931 Sam Cooke; 1932 Piper Laurie; 1934 Bill Bixby, Graham Kerr; 1937 Joseph Wambaugh; 1959 Linda Blair; 1963 Diane Lane.
• 1951: Fidel Castro is ejected from a Winter League game after beaning a batter; his argument with the umpire lasts seven hours.
23 1898 Sergei Eisenstein; 1898 Randolph Scott; 1899 Humphrey Bogart; 1906 Bob Steele; 1907 Dan Duryea; 1910 Django Reinhardt; 1919 Ernie Kovacs; 1928 Jeanne Moreau; 1933 Chita Rivera; 1944 Rutger Hauer.
• 1975: Barney Miller premieres.
• 1983: The A-Team premieres.
• 1986: First inductees into Rock 'n' Roll Hall of Fame are Chuck Berry, James Brown, Ray Charles, Fats Domino, Everly Brothers, Buddy Holly, Jerry Lee Lewis & Elvis Presley.
24 1915 Ernest Borgnine; 1941 Neil Diamond, Aaron Neville; 1948 Elliott Abrams; 1949 John Belushi; 1960 Nastassja Kinski; 1968 Mary Lou Retton.
• 1848: Gold discovered at Sutter's Mill.
• 1899: Rubber heel patented.
• 1908: Baden-Powell starts Boy-Scouts.
25 1931 Dean Jones; 1933 Corazón Aquino.
• 1870: Some jerk patents the soda fountain.
• 1890: Intrepid girl reporter Nellie Bly circles the globe in 72 days, beating Phileas Fogg's around the world in 80 days-record; when she's told that Fogg is a fictional character and his whole trip was made up, the look on her face is just priceless.
• 1919: League of Nations founded.
• 1985: We are the World recorded.
• 1989: Yankees owner George Steinbrenner meets with Pope John Paul II; pontiff turns down “tempting” offer to replace Billy Martin as manager.
26 1925 Paul Newman; 1928 Philip Jose Farmer, Roger Vadim; 1929 Jules Feiffer; 1935 Bob Uecker; 1942 Scott Glenn; 1946 Gene Siskel; 1950 David Strathairn; 1953 Lucinda Williams; 1957 Eddie Van Halen; 1958 Ellen DeGeneres.
• 1989: U.S. computer security expert warns of catastrophic virus.
27 1756 Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart; 1832 Lewis Carroll; 1850 Samuel Gompers; 1885 Jerome Kern; 1918 Skitch Henderson; 1936 Troy Donahue; 1957 Frank Miller; 1959 Keith Olbermann; 1964 Bridget Fonda.
• 1888: National Geographic Society organized; appropriately, this happens in a doctor's office waiting room.
• 1961: Sing Along with Mitch premieres.
• 1977: Roots debuts.
28 1912 Jackson Pollock; 1929 Claes Oldenburg; 1936 Alan Alda; 1955 Nicolas Sarkozy: 1981 Elijah Wood.
• 1914: Beverly Hills, California, is incorporated.
• 1916: First Jewish Supreme Court justice, Louis Brandeis, nominated.
29 1737 Thomas Paine; 1843 William McKinley; 1878 Barney Oldfield; 1880 W.C. Fields; 1908 Adam Clayton Powell; 1911 Bernard Herrmann; 1912 Professor Irwin Corey; 1942 Katharine Ross; 1945 Tom Selleck; 1952 Tommy Ramone; 1954 Oprah Winfrey; 1975 Sara Gilbert.
• 1951: Liz Taylor's first divorce (Conrad Hilton Jr.).
• 1958: Paul Newman & Joanne Woodward wed.
• 1845: Edgar Allen Poe's The Raven first published; he asks when they'll run it again and is told, "nevermore".
30 1882 Franklin Delano Roosevelt; 1931 Gene Hackman; 1933 Louis Rukeyser; 1935 Richard Brautigan; 1941 Dick Cheney; 1951 Phil Collins; 1958 Brett Butler.
• 1969: Beatles perform their last gig together, a free concert on the roof of Apple's London HQ.
• 1973: KISS play their first show.
31 1903 Tallulah Bankhead; 1923 Norman Mailer; 1937 Philip Glass, Suzanne Pleshette; 1959 Anthony LaPaglia, Kelly Lynch.
• 1957: Liz Taylor's second divorce (Michael Wilding).
• 1958: Jackpot Bowling, hosted by Leo Durocher, premieres. Yes, really. We are not making this up.
• 1862: Telescope maker Alvin Clark discovers dwarf companion of Sirius; not that there's anything wrong with that.
• 1974: McDonald's founder Ray Kroc buys the San Diego Padres; players can now make extra money in the off-season flipping burgers.